Texts From Last Night

Texts from May, 2009

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  (801): View more from Utah

  Yah man, that place is surreal

  (731): View more from Tennessee

  Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?

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  (801): Yah man, that place is surreal (731): Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal? http://tfl.nu/sga3
  Replies (70) Good night (3118) Bad night (754)
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  (714): View more from California

  I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.

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  (714): I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy. http://tfl.nu/mwni
  Replies (10) Good night (570) Bad night (2655) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?

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  (609): Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do? http://tfl.nu/p111
  Replies (110) Good night (2061) Bad night (1393) Order T-Shirt
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  (510): View more from California

  I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.

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  (510): I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach. http://tfl.nu/edrh
  Replies (13) Good night (719) Bad night (3622) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"

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  (678): I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute" http://tfl.nu/6gqy
  Replies (10) Good night (845) Bad night (2618) Order T-Shirt
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  (253): View more from Washington

  she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?

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  (253): she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person? http://tfl.nu/ofbb
  Replies (22) Good night (849) Bad night (3023) Order T-Shirt
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.

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  (705): I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single. http://tfl.nu/i1tx
  Replies (47) Good night (1347) Bad night (3674) Order T-Shirt
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  (858): View more from California

  sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?

  (818): View more from California

  No. He thinks you're slutty.

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  (858): sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat? (818): No. He thinks you're slutty. http://tfl.nu/f63c
  Replies (37) Good night (752) Bad night (3582)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.

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  (908): We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends. http://tfl.nu/o9if
  Replies (35) Good night (5017) Bad night (555) Order T-Shirt
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???

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  (303): do u usually make out with people before telling them your name??? http://tfl.nu/ocp0
  Replies (27) Good night (3409) Bad night (619) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?

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  (612): Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka? http://tfl.nu/htpr
  Replies (24) Good night (3635) Bad night (778) Order T-Shirt
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  (323): View more from California

  i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Special does not even begin to describe that text.

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  (323): i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet. (918): Special does not even begin to describe that text. http://tfl.nu/d8xn
  Replies (6) Good night (2917) Bad night (746)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards.

  (773): View more from Illinois

  Stop texting me, I'm right here.

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  (502): im typing and i feel like my hands are on backwards. (773): Stop texting me, I'm right here. http://tfl.nu/1yrs
  Replies (8) Good night (4146) Bad night (584)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.

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  (603): I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome. http://tfl.nu/ibqv
  Replies (16) Good night (4691) Bad night (578) Order T-Shirt
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  (712): View more from Iowa

  I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.

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  (712): I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up. http://tfl.nu/k85m
  Replies (14) Good night (3657) Bad night (689) Order T-Shirt