Texts From Last Night

Worst Nights of Today

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  (702): View more from Nevada

  I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.

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  (702): I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century. http://tfl.nu/3h7h
  Replies (9) Good night (81) Bad night (702) Order T-Shirt
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  (909): View more from California

  It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.

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  (909): It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer. http://tfl.nu/6a0i
  Replies (5) Good night (79) Bad night (541) Order T-Shirt
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?

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  (563): I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join? http://tfl.nu/9f19
  Replies (4) Good night (116) Bad night (397) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.

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  (727): Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules. http://tfl.nu/9nm8
  Replies (3) Good night (299) Bad night (367) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...

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  (651): It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart... http://tfl.nu/9gca
  Replies (3) Good night (110) Bad night (326) Order T-Shirt
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  (772): View more from Florida

  So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.

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  (772): So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me. http://tfl.nu/5rwa
  Replies (5) Good night (700) Bad night (286) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.

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  (614): I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia. http://tfl.nu/a7rk
  Replies (5) Good night (102) Bad night (249) Order T-Shirt
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.

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  (952): Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost. http://tfl.nu/9cwp
  Replies (0) Good night (152) Bad night (239) Order T-Shirt
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry

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  (785): Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry http://tfl.nu/dsfb
  Replies (4) Good night (52) Bad night (201) Order T-Shirt
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue

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  (541): I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue http://tfl.nu/me08
  Replies (4) Good night (156) Bad night (183) Order T-Shirt
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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.

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  (505): I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles. http://tfl.nu/rqwc
  Replies (2) Good night (336) Bad night (158)
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  (516): View more from New York

  He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this

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  (516): He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this http://tfl.nu/b4ty
  Replies (6) Good night (760) Bad night (133) Order T-Shirt
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  (514): View more from Quebec

  the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon

  (514): View more from Quebec

  what does alcohol mean

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  (514): the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon (514): what does alcohol mean http://tfl.nu/hh45
  Replies (2) Good night (371) Bad night (122)
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them

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  (570): Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them http://tfl.nu/2e8h
  Replies (2) Good night (323) Bad night (109) Order T-Shirt
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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.

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  (252): Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing. http://tfl.nu/p5zs
  Replies (2) Good night (379) Bad night (109) Order T-Shirt